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Thursday, November 17, 2011

How to Face Death - Part 2

A few more thoughts on how to prepare for the unexpected. You can read my first blog post on this series here.

3) Do you want to be buried or cremated? It's sometimes hard to remember life before Matt died, but I *think* I assumed he wanted to be buried. At least, that assumption is what made me decide to bury him. However, I don't know that with any certainty. From what I have gathered, cremation is becoming a more popular choice in the past few years. Cremation is better for the environment, leaving less chemicals behind for decomposition (which are mostly found in the casket and vault), and taking up less space on our planet. Cremation can also be cheaper. The thought of being cremated versus decomposing is an issue for some people, and so that makes cremation or burial a subject worth thinking on and discussing.

4) If you choose to be buried, do you know where you would like to be buried? If you are a young couple, and home is a new city you've only lived in a few years maybe being buried there is not ideal for you. Maybe you really don't care, and if you don't - great, tell your spouse that. This idea must be discussed for cremation as well. If you are to be cremated, what you like your spouse to do with the remains? Keep them displayed in your home? For how long? Do you want them spread somewhere? Where?

5) This may seem like a silly one, but I have lived through the fear of walking into a casket room. Others I know have shared similar stories, so I feel the need to share with you. If you will be buried, your spouse must enter a room filled with caskets ... some small, some big, some comfy, some fancy, some oak, some metal ... they must pick the place you will rest forever in the ground. Although it sounds dramatic, the weight of this choice is nothing less than that when brought into that room. Your heart desires to give your spouse the best, but the difference between 'the best' and 'a box', when it comes to caskets, is literally thousands of dollars. Unfortunately, I imagine funeral homes are aware of this tension, and likely make money off of this very thing. Please, give your spouse the okay to bury you in a cheap casket, with a vault that has a sub par seal on it. You will not know what you are laid to rest in, no one at the funeral will notice the hardware of your casket, and your children will have extra money for college. For those of you who are would like to be cremated, and your remains kept, you will need to answer this question as well (because you can be placed in a tiny wooden box or fancy gem encrusted vase ... they put these in the same room as the caskets).


I didn't plan this list out prior to writing it, which means, I don't know how long this series will go on for. I can think of at least 3 more topics I would like to touch on before I'm done with this little series. I will put all of the topics in a listed format, easier for discussing, when I'm at the end. Grace and Peace.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

My husband passed away Nov 23, just 4 days ago... the urn i ordered online is to arrive Tuesday, tomorrow is the cremation... Wednesday is the memorial service... i am numb, yet in absolute anguish. I'm very sorry for YOUR loss. (((hugs)))Your blog is great ~